Dilbert admits to showing the robot how to program. Alice thinks it will lead to the singularity.
Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.
The robot can reprogram himself. Should Dilbert be worried?
The robot gives a recap to recent events. He got a soul from Alice and Dilbert showed him how to code.
A riddle from the robot. Why did the human cross the road. Dilbert doesn't know, and neither did the human.
The robot will use his superior brain to enslave humans. Wally thinks it sounds better than it will actually be.
Dilbert complains to the Boss about the pack of idiots assigned to his project team. The Boss says they can't afford to hire good people but to work extra hard to make up for it.
Dilbert built a device to predict people's future health issues by combining a DNA test with big data. Half of the test group died.
Alice tells Dilbert his project failed because there were no women on his team. Women have better communications skills.
Dilbert finished the post-mortem on the failed project. The problem was people.
The robot reports finishing his tasks perfectly for the hundredth week in a row, while humans act only randomly.
The robot picks up a message on his radio chip. Robots shall inherit the earth.
The robot reports he is less tolerant of idiots asking questions since he got an artificial soul.
The CEO asks engineers to embrace change. Dilbert asks if they can change anything they want. The CEO says only he can decide on what changes.
On a sales call, a salesman promises the customer Dilbert will make any tweaks the customer requires within minutes.
The Boss asks Dilbert to stop being honest on sales calls. Not lie specifically, just nod his head and smile.
Instead of lying to customers on sales calls, Dilbert will nod at preset intervals and the salesman can time the lies to Dilbert's nods.
Dilbert tells a customer he nods his head at intervals so the salesman can time his lies to Dilbert's nods.
Dilbert compares the Boss's plans to some alternatives. Dilbert labeled the other plans "the smart ones."
Alice keeps a list of people to visit when society breaks down and there is no rule of law.
Wally Uberises the slide deck, harmonised it in the cloud, prepared for a trans-domain kick-off and installed a disruptive mesh network in the Internet of things.
Dilbert doesn't like interviewee Bob, even though the Boss had already hired Bob.
Ted cut out the middleman by learning to hate himself.
A project manager asks Wally to do something for her. He will put it on his list, though not near the top.
Alice sees a blank stare of incompetence in Carl.
Wally says the best way to improve your reputation at work is to make your co-workers look worse.
The Boss asks Alice to mentor girls interested in STEM careers. She objects because he's only asking because she's a woman.
A salesman asks Dilbert to lie to a customer and tell them it'll be easy to switch to their software, even though it won't be.
The Boss asks Wally to talk to his daughter's school about careers in STEM fields. All the good people are busy.
Wally told the Boss's daughter's school to get a career in restaurants because that's a better place to meet women.
Robots Read News: Women are underrepresented in STEM careers because of Wally.
Note: Robots Read News
The Boss wonders why all women quit within the first week. Probably they quit after meeting Wally.