The Boss asks why Dilbert is doing a bad job on his assignment and Dilbert blames management who didn't match his skills to the assignment.
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Dilbert and Wally discuss Apple's next phone when Topper interrupts. And then Topper from the future interrupts.
Mordac rejects Dilbert's business case because he used the old template. It didn't bother Dilbert.
There's no budget for network monitoring software so the Boss asks Dilbert to write it.
Dilbert describes what he does for a living to a woman at a party. He is working on a framework to allow construction of large-scale analytical queries on unstructured data.
The Boss introduces Lars, the better version of Dilbert.
Tina get turns on by Lars, the cooler version of Dilbert.
A co-worker wants to know why Dilbert thinks the design would be inefficient but Dilbert doesn't want to explain.
Dilbert doesn't want to drive to an unfamiliar place with Alice because she'll argue with the GPS.
While walking with a woman, Dilbert wants to check something on his phone. She says it's humiliating and disrespectful if he prefers his phone to her company.
Asok asks to be a remora for a trade show, where he suctions to the back of a larger man's visit.
A co-worker gives Dilbert some push-back on his due dates. Dilbert asks what excuse he should tell the others, lazy or incompetent.
The CEO got away with some insider trading. It was a victimless crime.
Poor people invented ethics to control rich people, says the CEO.
Dogbert becomes a money manager for dumb celebrities, those who don't pay attention to what happens to their money.
A co-worker can't find her phone so she's late or a meeting with a customer. The engineers say she forgets or loses everything.
The Boss feels sorry for the engineers because he's been too busy lately to manage them.
An interviewee asks the Boss how to help support the Boss's goals. The Boss replies to work 80-hour weeks for cheap.
The CEO says persistence is the key to success. He also says it's key to know when to quit.
Wally says attitudes are socially contagious, and is lazy because of the co-worker sitting next to him.
Asok misunderstands the Boss when he gets instructions full of idioms, like choke the pooch and throw him under the bus.
A co-worker wants to lend Dilbert a good book. Dilbert doesn't want to let others decide how he'll spend his free time.
Dilbert asks for a decision from the Boss. The Boss wants to get Dilbert's recommendation, but Dilbert wants to get the Boss to decide. It's all a matter of assigning the blame.
The CEO is dismayed when he accidentally wanders into the grimy habitat of underlings.
The Boss asks Carol about a study that says doing repetitive tasks stimulates creativity. So Carol must be the most creative person in the office.
Dilbert wants a co-worker to e-mail data to him, but she says they don't do it that way. He's unable to understand anything she says.
A social media expert tells the Boss he will increase the company's web traffic but is vague about how.
Dilbert asks a social media expert how he plans to charge the company. Is it based on how much the traffic increases? No, it's whatever he thinks the company will pay.
The CEO says the executive team figured out the source of all problems. Dilbert asks if the problem is the constantly changing executive team and strategy.
A co-worker told the Boss Wally was being unhelpful, so Wally shows his skill at deflecting criticism back onto the co-worker.