An Elbonian asks Dilbert to help him escape from Dogbert's running-shoe factory in the basement.
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A cartoonist in a cubicle may embarrass the company so the Boss must assign absurd work until he quits.
A cartoonist looks around the office for inspiration.
The Boss asks the cartoonist to stop mocking the management of the company in the newspapers.
The cartoonist says his side job is doing well so he hands in his resignation to the Boss.
A new guy asks Dilbert how long before the dark cloud of hopelessness and despair begins to go away.
Dilbert ignores e-mail from people who don't include his original message in their reply.
A co-worker complains Dilbert never answers her e-mail. He says her e-mails are hard to read.
Wally goes to meetings and never gets any action items by using a certain facial expression to ward them off.
After his presentation, Dilbert asks if there are any questions designed to increase his workload for their entertainment.
Dogbert's tech support advises to turn off everything including lights, water heater, microwave and refrigerator.
Dogbert's tech support selects a product from the caller's computer to blame for all the problems.
Disgruntled Doug is to work on the company's pricing model, and the Boss puts him in a cardboard box instead of a cubicle.
A co-worker asks to move to a window cubicle after 25 years without one.
Dilbert is happy no one can take his name until his credit card company calls and says someone stole his identity.
Dogbert advises the Boss to get a dashboard application to show metrics so he can ignore it when making policy decisions.
The Boss is worried the metrics on his dashboard aren't good so needs to falsify them.
The Boss awards Carol some morale dollars she can use to redeem for gifts and services she doesn't want or need.
The Boss asks Ted to work late every night until they catch up. And work every weekend.
Every project Dilbert worked on got cancelled after the reorganisation. It's like he didn't exist.
Dilbert asks a co-worker to sign off on a plan in writing so he can't raise any objections later.
Other department heads won't sign off on the business plan so they'll look good in comparison.
At a productive management retreat, they golfed hard until they came up with a new vision for the company.
Catbert asks Asok to have more of a winner's mentality.
Ted is so busy his head explodes.
Note: This strip is almost identical to one published on 2008-09-18.
Dilbert is asked to help with a technical analysis but wants his lawn mowed in return.
Alice is employee of the month but doesn't want any of the rewards.
Dogbert the lawyer threatens a web page company for stealing people's cursors.
Ratbert teases Dilbert he will wear clothes he doesn't want to wear and spend the day where he doesn't want to be.
Ratbert brags he will be eating Dilbert's computer cables.
Asok gets a text message from the Boss. "KEEP UP WRK."