Marketing asks for Wally's help on the new product. The product is worthless, too.
Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.
Wally sees the new product, which just occupies space and smells bad. They need a name for the product.
Ninety percent of the customers want to beat Wally to death with his stupid product.
Wally designs product collateral by comparing their product to even worse products.
Dogbert shows how to use your incompetence to achieve your career goals.
Dilbert discovers a dead co-worker in a cubicle.
Alice discovers a dead person in his cubicle. Dilbert had already seen him.
Wally stops by a dead co-workers cubicle to find out for sure if he's dead.
Carol reports to the Boss one of the employees is dead.
The Boss asks Dilbert to get data from a co-worker who doesn't answer his phone or e-mail.
Dilbert asks Dogbert how to get data from an unreachable guy. Dogbert says to just make up the data.
The Boss introduces his team to someone who will be making a proposal.
Topper says he strangled 900 insurgents with his bare hands.
Topper says he passed a kidney stone the size of a small horse.
Topper says he used too much tanning spray and Brand and Angelina adopted him.
Tina rewrites the project scope instead of just updating the project status.
Since the project scope was changed a team member asks to get off the project.
Dilbert says he doesn't have enough resources to do the project. The Boss says the project isn't important and neither is Dilbert.
Dilbert asks his date if she likes conversation. They can't agree on a good topic, though.
Alice meets a marketing guy who talks out of the ass on his head.
Dilbert asks a marketing guy for data on customer preferences. The marketing guy pulls it out of his ass on the top of his head.
Note: An early version showed the marketing guy ass on his head. The published version covered up the ass with underpants.
Dilbert combines lies from marketing with the Boss's assumptions and then factors in reality.
Dilbert meets a new, older, experienced employee.
Asok meets an older employee. The Boss asks Asok to explain what computers are.
The older employee says he didn't have ipods, cell phones, video games or computers when he was young.
The Boss introduces Six Sigma, the new methodology. Dilbert says it was a fad discredited years ago.
The Boss asks Asok to get the client a "little bit pregnant."
Dilbert helps a co-worker solve an engineering problem he's been working on for six months.
An accounting troll says they might need to restate the earnings. It turns out they're not allowed to make up numbers.
A news report says the company restated its earnings from a few frillion to a loss of a billion. Dilbert thinks it's humiliating.