Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.

A co-worker asks Dilbert to fix his home computer after work.
Engineer, after work, fix, computer, cleaning, grout, tile, shower, bathroom, crazy talk, majored, comparative literature, liberal arts, Dilbert, co-worker

A co-worker asks Dilbert to install his wireless network on the weekend.
Engineer, weekend, install, wireless network, competent, obliged, incompetent, awkward, stare, Dilbert, co-worker

The Boss asks Dilbert to accompany a salesman on a sales call.
Start of saga: The sales call
Sales, sales call, explain, product, current system, crack joke, joke, commission, unfair, good joke, what can I do you for?, Dilbert, Boss, Alan

Dilbert describes their technology while the salesman makes out with one of the customers.
Sales, sales call, egghead, make out, web service, XML, soap, wsdl, interoperable, http, module, wrong job, kiss, Dilbert, Alan, woman, man

A hot, intelligent, sane woman tries to find a date in the engineering department.
Dating, lunch, horrible defect, apparent, hot, intelligent, sane, attracted, coffee, Battlestar Galactica, perfect monster, engineering department, date, woman, Wally, Dilbert

The Boss suspects he can't read people.
Management, monitor, passersby, working, sleeping, read, kidding, litter box, bathroom, toilet, Wally, Boss, Catbert

The Boss assigns Asok to be the new fire warden for the floor.
Safety, fire warden, floor, roll around, timing, intern, Boss, Asok

The Boss complains to Catbert he doesn't have enough time to learn about the projects he's managing.
Project, busy, learn, project, managing, time, critical decision, lazy, stupid, pond, throw, rock, duck, Boss, Catbert

Dogbert commences his school for zombies and/or certified project managers.
Start of saga: Dogbert's school for zombies and/or certified project managers
Dogbert-Schemes, school, zombie, zombie, certified, project manager, training, sun, calendar, on-site, cutover, support, review, meeting, Dogbert

Wally irritates the certified project management zombie.
Management, zombie, certified, project manager, project management, meeting, review, assumption, risk, constraint, management style, joie de vivre, joy of life, Wally, zombie, Dilbert, Alice

Alice slays the certified project management zombie.
Management, zombie, certified, project manager, project management, assertive, innovative, professional, experienced, operations management, methodology, process, development, dangerous, meeting, review, sword, kill, murder, zombie, Dilbert, Alice

Alice gets a co-worker fired so she can use his cubicle to store her extra binders.
Office Politics, appreciate, pushback, push back, yes men, stand your ground, respect, business unit, plan, fired, cruelty, convenience, cubicle, binder, Dilbert, Alice, CEO, co-worker

The Boss decides there's no good way to assign a bad project, so he literally hits the employee with it.
Management, assign, assignment, bad project, throw, hit, liberating, Boss, co-worker

The Boss tries to sell Dilbert on his new assignment.
Project, lipstick, pig, exciting, technical, challenge, dawn, microprocessor, rub, body, assign, tongs, Boss, Dilbert

Dilbert changes the results of his feasibility study when he finds out the CEO loves the idea.
Start of saga: The land of unrealistic business assumptions
Office Politics, feasibility analysis, worst idea, numbers don't lie, CEO, assumption, lie, Boss, Dilbert

Dilbert asks Dogbert for help making unrealistic assumptions to support a bad idea.
Dogbert-Schemes, unrealistic, assumption, support, business case, bad idea, hole, wardrobe, magical world, preposterous, closet, Dilbert, Dogbert

Dilbert and Dogbert visit the Land of Unrealistic Business Assumptions.
Business, unrealistic, business, assumption, assumption, gold, mushroom, toadstool, consumer, bad judgement, hole, thousand miles deep, come early, Dilbert, Dogbert, consumer

Dilbert and Dogbert encounter their only competitor in the Land of Unrealistic Business Assumptions.
Business, unrealistic, business, assumption, assumption, future sales, smiley face, log, tree trunk, bridge, chasm, jug, moonshine, hillbilly, inebriated, drunk, kick, competitor, fall, plummet, boot, Dilbert, Dogbert, hillbilly

Dilbert considers buying a more fuel efficient car. Dogbert ridicules him for doing so.
Politics, fuel efficient, car, automobile, patriotic duty, dependence, foreign, oil, petroleum, hate, money, fund, terrorist, developing country, fungible, commodity, capitalist, lowest cost, statement, Dogbert, Dilbert

Wally describes his week of "telecommuting" and makes a joke about the TV in his pyjamas.
Telecommuting, telecommuting, TV, pyjamas, joke, pun, Boss, Wally, Dilbert, Alice

Wally charges his vacation as a sick day because he ate too many potato chips.
Vacation, stomachache, sick day, biological limit, potato chips, Wally, Boss

Wally tells the Boss the Internet is full, that's why his e-mail isn't working.
Note: This strip was adapted for a 404 error, and used as part of the 404 page at
Technology, e-mail, Internet, full, draining, drain, network, Ethernet, cable, trashcan, Wally, Boss

The Boss forgets what he majored in.
Management, funny, studied, engineering, majored, don't remember, forgot, write down, Dilbert, Boss

Dogbert commences his seminar on work-life balance.
Start of saga: Dogbert's seminar on work-life balance
Overwork, seminar, work, life, work-life, balance, priority, family, job, exercise, vacation, must-do, medical, eating, hygiene, sleep, romance, holiday, time, pick, limitation, Dogbert, Asok, Boss, Alice, Dilbert, Wally

Dogbert continues his seminar on work-life balance with an example.
Overwork, seminar, work, life, work-life, balance, personal life, CEO, mistaken identity, Dogbert, old man, Allen, young women

The Boss berates Dilbert for his project being four months behind. Dilbert is stuck with an unresponsive user.
Project, project, behind schedule, requirement, nut job, manage, process, complained, misinterpreted, problem, ordered, wrong stuff, family, serious illness, jury duty, copied, similar, Boss, Dilbert, user

Wally uses a fake arm to fool the Boss into thinking he's on a conference call.
Management, fake arm, mail room, shoulder, telephone, conference call, sleeping, Wally, Boss, Dilbert

The Boss has Asok take distance learning classes for him so the Boss will get a Master's degree.
Start of saga: Asok earns the Boss a master's degree
Ethics, enrolled, distance learning, class, course, master's degree, online degree, midterm, cheating, Boss, Asok, Catbert