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2004-07-01
The new hire is warned about Wally in the employee orientation.
Dating, stalk, new hire, employee orientation, workplace hazards, Alice, Wally, Dilbert, woman

2004-07-02
A co-worker doesn't take Dilbert's hint he's ready for the meeting to end.
Meeting, papers, hint, signal, Dilbert, co-worker, Dogbert

2004-07-03
Dilbert suggests a money saving idea, but the Boss demands a written business case and full analysis.
Management, consolidate, sublet, space, business case, risks, drivers, Dilbert, Boss

2004-07-04
Carol doesn't allow the Boss to have meetings anymore.
Secretary, schedule, meeting, madness, e-mail, telephone, disconnected, cables, Carol, Dilbert, Boss

2004-07-05
The Boss wants to talk about what Dilbert has done, but then leaves him hanging.
Start of saga: Dilbert is left hanging and time freezes
Management, telephone, hanging, wristwatch, time, stopped, frozen, freeze, Dilbert, Boss

2004-07-06
Time stops for Dilbert while the Boss is on the phone.
Management, time, stopped, bad news, invent, language, beard, eternity, Dilbert, Boss

2004-07-07
Dilbert tells his date how he grew his beard while waiting for the Boss to get off the phone.
Dating, beard, restaurant, wine, telephone, exercise, discipline, menu, cigar, suspenders, Dilbert, Dilbert's date, waitress

2004-07-08
Dilbert plans to give up all forms of hygiene.
Personal, time, shaving, beard, hygiene, telecommuting, toenails, Dilbert, Wally

2004-07-09
Dilbert decides to shave off his beard.
Management, shave, beard, telephone, envelope licker, story, anecdote, Dilbert, Dogbert, Boss, Alice

2004-07-10
Catbert plans a goodbye party for those being downsized.
Personnel, goodbye, party, downsize, t-shirt, special guests, cake, Catbert, Dilbert, Asok, Boss, Wally, Alice, downsizee

2004-07-11
The Boss hires an alien for a job that is immediately outsourced.
Management, alien, gullible, nebula, relocate, family, spaceship, outsource, severance package, reference, Boss, Proxis, Dilbert

2004-07-12
Wally is into his fifth month with no written objectives.
Philosophy, written objectives, philosopher, freedom, help, hiding, Wally, Boss, Dilbert

2004-07-13
The Boss wants Dilbert to negotiate the sale of part of their business.
Start of saga: Dilbert the business negotiator
Business, negotiate, sale, voice activated, hassock, footrest, ottoman, lie, omissions, misdirections, exaggerations, optimism, documents, explanations, grey area, ignorance, Boss, Dilbert

2004-07-14
Dilbert starts negotiating the sale of part of their business.
Business, negotiate, authorised, offers, phraseology, lie, sweat, Dilbert, buyer

2004-07-15
Dilbert does a lousy job negotiating.
Business, negotiate, opening offer, accept, ruin, Dilbert, buyer

2004-07-16
Dilbert brings the negotiations to an end.
Business, negotiate, contract, expenses, legal liabilities, revenue, patents, public credit, swimming pool, bare hands, spoon, Dilbert, buyer

2004-07-17
Dogbert observes the Company's stock goes down whenever Dilbert does anything.
Investment, stock, plunge, news, acquire, shares, motionless, remote control, Dogbert, Dilbert

2004-07-18
Catbert gives the Boss an idea for motivating the staff.
Leadership, motivation, threat, belittle, humiliation, promises, berate, slogans, posters, bully, praise, raise, trophy wife, yell, purple, Boss, Catbert, Carol

2004-07-19
Catbert announces stock options are to be replaced with a bonus system.
Benefits, stock options, bonus, happiness, kindness, management, gullible, investors, hairball, Catbert, Dilbert, Wally, Boss, Asok

2004-07-20
Catbert recommends hiring feral employees.
Start of saga: The feral employee
Personnel, afford, budget, trained employees, alley, creamer, cage, Boss, Catbert, feral employees

2004-07-21
The Boss hires a feral employee.
Personnel, feral employee, inexpensive, cheap, untrained, bite, eat, run away, Boss, Dilbert, Will

2004-07-22
The Boss assigns Wally to teach the new feral employee how to use indoor plumbing.
Training, feral employee, chance, risk, regret, professional, indoor plumbing, newspaper, restroom, bathroom, Boss, Wally, Will

2004-07-23
A woman likes the new feral employee because he's a challenge.
Dating, feral employee, untamed, challenge, bicycle pants, mow, lawn, woman, Will, Dilbert, Asok, Wally

2004-07-24
The new feral employee complains marketing wouldn't him the products specs.
Marketing, feral employee, product specs, dumpster diving, french fry, Will, Boss, Dilbert

2004-07-25
The VP of marketing describes their new "bet the company" strategy.
Marketing, bet-the-company, strategy, advertising, talking, squirrel, Norwegian Accent, fraud, Boss, marketeer, Dilbert, Alice, Wally, Asok

2004-07-26
The Boss forgets how many quarters are in a year.
Management, quarters, year, leap year, penny, board meeting, smart, Boss, Carol

2004-07-27
A co-worker asks Dilbert to lunch to propose a pyramid scheme.
Entrepreneur, lunch, opportunity, pyramid scheme, multi-level marketing, diet, Bible, Dilbert, co-worker

2004-07-28
Dilbert announces their plan to generate electricity from their founder spinning in his grave.
Engineer, founder, copper wire, tombstone, headstone, magnet, business practises, spin, grave, electricity, Dilbert, Boss, Wally

2004-07-29
Dilbert got a bonus for being under budget.
Budget, bonus check, effort, reward, results, luck, delay, Dilbert, Alice

2004-07-30
Wally's excuse for being late is because his car wouldn't start.
Work Avoidance, late, tardy, car, start, cold, warm, wind chill factor, Wally, Boss, Dilbert

2004-07-31
Dogbert's tech support starts by blaming the problem on another company.
Tech Support, Dogbert's tech support, problem, product, services, determine, answer, pretend, telephone headset, Dogbert, man