Ted is fired and requests to live in his cubicle.
Downsizing, fired, rent, live, cubicle, fire, cannibal, regret, Ted, Boss
Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.
Friday is the cruelest day of the week for layoffs, so that's when it will happen.
Downsizing, layoff, Friday, cruel, employee appreciation day, congratulate, month, orgasm, Boss, Catbert, Dilbert, Wally, co-worker
Wally reports his accomplishments for the week: scheduling a meeting.
Meeting, status meeting, conference room, schedule, accomplishment, mill around, gave up, confuse, Wally Report, Wally, Boss, Dilbert
The Boss asks Carol to book the conference room every day for the next year.
Management, reserve, conference room, sociopath, idea, slow, Boss, Carol
Dogbert tells the Boss how to use his time more efficiently: prioritise tasks into two lists, high and low.
Management, time management, priority, list, kill, loser, Dogbert, Boss
A salesman gives Dilbert a gift that's slightly over the limit of what Dilbert is allowed to accept.
Sales, gift, value, rule, worth, accept, present, Dilbert, salesman, Alice
The Boss threatens to fire Asok if he criticises the government.
Society, free speech, criticise, government, fire, enjoy, pastry, free country, doughnut, Asok, Boss, Wally
Dogbert advises the Boss to hire people who won't threaten him, and offers the services of his recruitment agency.
Dogbert-Schemes, hire, threat, Dogbert Recruitment Agency, placement, clueless, bad hair, cadaver, brochure, Dogbert, Boss
The Boss shows everyone the Teamwork Football, to symbolise their commitment to teamwork.
Management, teamwork football, symbol, commitment, carry, meeting, customer, vacation, coffee, desk drawer, golf ball, Boss, Dilbert, Wally, Alice
The Boss announces they've hired a design firm in hopes of copying their methods.
Start of saga: Creative design training
Management, hire, innovation, design firm, observe, method, steal, secret, easel, meeting, Boss, Dilbert, Alice, Asok, Wally
In a creativity exercise, the teams make devices, most better than Dilbert and his team.
Training, creativity exercise, team, air to electricity, missile defence laser, scissors holder, gizmo, instructor, Boss, Dilbert, Alice, Wally
The design training continues where the team will make insightful observations from the brainstorming notes.
Training, odd-shape, foam, sit, design process, brainstorming, insightful observation, yellow, engineer, sweet jeepers, instructor, Dilbert, Wally, Alice
The design training continues where the team will design and make a mock-up. Dilbert questions who dominates the team.
Training, team, design, build, mock up, exercise, dominate, worst, suggestion, instructor, Dilbert, Boss, Wally, Alice
Dilbert wants to use a photocopier but must supply his own paper.
Office Services, copier, broken, paper, office, mile, unleash, hound, web designer, tight labour market, ear, disguise, Dilbert, secretary, web designer
Dilbert arrives for the meeting and wonders who called it.
Meeting, call, issue, assign, task, waste of time, lifeform, reproduce, human hosts, Dilbert, Ted, co-worker
Wally asks the Boss if he can telecommute one day a week. The Boss says okay, but only if Wally wears an uncomfortable hat.
Telecommuting, work, home, unhappy, uncomfortable hat, extreme, joke, purple, Wally, Boss
Tina looks for volunteers to serve food to the homeless on Christmas day.
Society, sign up, volunteer, food, homeless, Christmas day, hungry, PR firm, news crew, Tina, Dilbert
The Boss announces a survey says compensation at this company is competitive.
Professional, survey, compensation, competitive, work, pay, meeting, Boss, Dilbert, Alice
The Boss tells Wally he has not achieved any of his written objectives.
Performance Review, fail, written objectives, achievement, chance, hidden, project, smother, defective, Boss, Wally
The Boss transfers Dilbert to Elbonia because the cubicle-moving budget is shot.
Management, move, cubicle, budget, transfer, Elbonia, relocation, mail, shot, tin can, string, Boss, Elbonian, Dilbert, Elbonian pig
Ratbert asks Dilbert to sign an anti-war petition.
Family, petition, anti-war, signature, sell, give, clipboard, bathrobe, Ratbert, Dilbert
Ratbert shows his anti-war petition to Bob.
Family, document, important, hold, petition, war, Nobel Peace prize, drink, trade, clipboard, Ratbert, Bob
The Boss asks Alice to use her vacation time by the end of the year. She cannot, because she must finish her project.
Management, vacation, end of the year, project, solution, engineer, home, computer, network, access, dangle, Boss, Alice
Dilbert worries he may not be doing enough to enhance stockholder value.
Office Politics, feel guilty, enhance, stockholder value, glug, chug coffee, empty pot, Dilbert, Wally
A co-worker asks Dilbert why he hasn't responded to an e-mail.
Office Politics, e-mail, answer, message, poorly written, understand, dare, dialogue, boss, co-worker, Dilbert
Dilbert asks the Boss to approve an expense for equipment that has already been installed.
Management, approval, expense, equipment, install, description, understand, fine line, useless, Dilbert, Boss, Catbert
A new twist on "if you give a man a fish he will eat for a day."
Philosophy, give, fish, eat, teach, ugly hat, talk, consultant, starving, Dogbert, Boss
The Boss sends an e-mail to Alice about wanting to talk with her.
Management, e-mail, copy, message, tell, voicemail, fax, talk, redundant, communication, Boss, Alice
The Boss says Alice's working hard, evenings and weekends has finally paid off.
Management, hard work, night, weekend, paying off, forecast, demand, wild guess, Boss, Alice
The Boss gives Dilbert an urgent assignment but Dilbert can't read his handwriting.
Management, assignment, urgent, handwriting, question, call, odour, windy day, vanish, floog smort qlak munta hawthnort, monkey, duct tape, phantom manager, Boss, Dilbert, Carol
The Boss asks Carol to put together a morale boosting event.
Management, event, morale, boost, CPR, mummy, meeting, sarcasm, Boss, Carol