BFMartin.ca

Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.

1999-04-01
The Boss complains Wally doesn't answer his phone.
Management, telephone, answer, trick question, meeting, Boss, Wally

1999-04-02
Dilbert says the suggested process will fail no matter what.
Project, process, fail, effort, tool, conference call, Dilbert, Ted

1999-04-03
Dilbert's date says her last boyfriend was a despicable creep.
Dating, boyfriend, creep, crime, pay, Dilbert, Dilbert's date

1999-04-04
Dilbert reviews a press release for accuracy and spends most of his time correcting grammar.
Office Politics, PR, public relations, press release, accuracy, squirrel, grammar, criticism, spell, injury, bandage, Boss, Dilbert, Peggy, Dogbert

1999-04-05
The Boss wants to hide non-conforming documents prior to the upcoming ISO 9000 audit.
ISO 9000, audit, volunteer, document, torch, car, hide, trunk, Boss, Wally

1999-04-06
The Boss asks Asok to create a budget forecast.
Start of saga: Asok creates a budget forecast.
Budget, budget, forecast, job, satisfaction, guts, hate, Boss, Asok

1999-04-07
Wally wants a helicopter added to the budget forecast.
Budget, cycle, helicopter, padding, chopper, albino, tiger, cub, Wally, Asok

1999-04-08
Asok gives the Boss an early copy of the budget forecast.
Budget, calculate, double check, allow for error, mistake, upside-down, Boss, Asok

1999-04-09
Dilbert thinks Asok's budget won't work out.
Budget, spreadsheet, error, disaster, sing, Dilbert, Asok

1999-04-10
The Boss downsizes a department because he didn't look on the back of a piece of paper.
Budget, downsizing, ease of use, photocopy, ignorance, meeting, live, die, sword, Boss, Asok, Wally

1999-04-11
Ted dismisses Dilbert's request for information with lies -- and not even plausible ones.
Office Politics, information, request, lie, squirrel, secret, fob off, promise, military, lair, plausible, Dilbert, Ted, Wally

1999-04-12
Asok thinks the bonus plan will benefit him because he's working at peak performance.
Start of saga: Phil teaches Asok about life.
Philosophy, bonus, confidence, plan, Mr. Reality, car, pitchspoon, Boss, Asok, Phil, Wally, Dilbert

1999-04-13
Asok goes to Phil's secret lair to learn about reality.
Philosophy, lair, secret, reality, dumpster, cubicle, garbage, french fry, lumbar, comfort, pitchspoon, Phil, Asok

1999-04-14
Phil tells Asok life is like a dumpster.
Philosophy, lair, dumpster, garbage, life, stink, reincarnate, Phil, Asok

1999-04-15
Asok wants to repay Phil for teaching him about life.
Philosophy, life, repay, wax, spoon, luck, pitchspoon, Asok, Phil

1999-04-16
Dilbert's Mom wants revenge for the person who designed the operating system she uses.
Technology, moron, design, operating system, computer, lock up, reboot, kick, Dilbert's Mom, Dilbert

1999-04-17
Police investigate Dilbert's Mom because she threatened to kill a computer manufacturer.
Technology, threat, kill, computer, manufacturer, lock up, rebook, convince, police officer, Dilbert's Mom

1999-04-18
The Boss introduces Patty, a process manager, who doesn't know how to do anything, only how to do things better.
Management, process manager, meeting, improve, facilitate, Boss, Patty, Dilbert, Asok, Alice, Wally

1999-04-19
The Boss ignores Dilbert's greeting.
Management, greet, morning, ignore, exist, pay, Dilbert, Boss

1999-04-20
Alice presents the results of her risk assessment -- no risk of any management.
Management, risk management, assessment, blank, presentation, easel, Alice, Boss

1999-04-21
Dogbert recommends support only via the Internet and then trying to scare off people.
Tech Support, consulting, telephone, Internet, personal question, shower, home address, Dogbert

1999-04-22
Tina concludes her project needs to fail, with the blame going to the Boss.
Project, realise, success, fail, indecisive, strategy, nod, Tina, Boss

1999-04-23
Alice lists her morale issues to the Boss.
Management, misogyny, morale, issue, category, incompetence, arrogance, time of the month, laptop computer, sexist, Boss, Alice

1999-04-24
Catbert thinks tight pantyhose is responsible for Alice's morale problem.
Fashion, morale, pantyhose, head, oversize, blame, Catbert, Alice

1999-04-25
The Boss wants to solve their distribution problem the same way Eskimos store ice during winter.
Management, Dogbert Presents, managing by analogies, distribution, Eskimo, winter, Summer, ice, starve, eat, penguin, ban, hibachi, zoo, Dogbert, Boss, Dilbert

1999-04-26
Dilbert has lost weight, but Dogbert doesn't care.
Family, diet, weight loss, happy, supportive, encourage, tapped out, bathrobe, Dilbert, Dogbert

1999-04-27
The Boss wants to use inaccurate budget numbers.
Budget, accuracy, backup, back pocket, emergency, clueless, encryption, Boss, Dilbert

1999-04-28
Alice complains to Asok he never answers his phone.
Office Politics, telephone, call, fist of death, gnaw, escape, Alice, Asok, Wally, Dilbert

1999-04-29
Catbert starts an employee skills database.
Personnel, employee, skills database, first step, laugh, move jobs, fuzzy, Catbert, Asok, Wally

1999-04-30
There's been some thefts from the cubicles. The suspect's description matches the Boss.
Management, rash, theft, suspect, slow-witted, meeting, bulletin, pointy hair, Boss, Dilbert, Wally, Alice