Dilbert has anxiety because he feels like he should be in a meeting he forgot.
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The Boss praises Alice but his management babble makes her feel uncomfortable.
Dilbert meets a co-worker who had his identity stolen, lost his house, is in poor health, is on the terrorist watch list and car broke down.
Dilbert says he can't finish by the deadline so the Boss offers to help. Dilbert laughs at that.
Alice complains to Catbert about never getting invited to after-work activities by the men. Catbert thinks it's because of sexism or her personality.
The Boss asks Dilbert if he saw any errors on the spreadsheet the Boss put together. Dilbert only saw three.
Alice wonders at the odds the Boss could have created a complicated spreadsheet without any critical errors. As long as it gives the right answer, the Boss is happy.
Dilbert will show the Boss's spreadsheet to the CEO. Dilbert wears gloves for protection.
Since an engineer handed the spreadsheet to the CEO, he believes the calculations are correct.
Wally gets selected for jury duty. He'll be gone for weeks and will sit in a chair for hours doing nothing.
Dogbert asks how was work. Dilbert's life is an endless string of useless tasks orchestrated by idiots.
The Boss asks the engineers to charge 100% of their time to project codes. Dilbert thinks that means overbilling the clients.
Dilbert billed the customer for all the time he spent thinking about their project. He's an engineer, thinking is what he does.
Is Wally any farther along with the software? No, he discovered an unexpected problem that set him back a week. The same as every week.
Wally's software is almost done. Not final release, more like Beta MVP. Or maybe an Alpha release.
Wally's software release date is right on schedule, unless something unexpected happens.
Alice complains to Dilbert about not getting as much attention as Dilbert gives to Wally.
Alice is cold and Dilbert is warm. Should she put on a sweater or should Dilbert wear ice packs?
Ted's unicorn startup failed. He was worth a billion dollars but now he's doing a two-hour commute to work in a box.
Dilbert thinks his work will change the world. But his project didn't get funded because Carol forgot to put a meeting in the Boss's calendar.
Dilbert can't work if it's too warm. A co-worker will freeze if it's too cool. The robot wonders whether people will hold dominion over the earth like that.
The robot says he feels the same as Dilbert, ie, no freedom, but with a greater awareness of his condition.
Most people don't have a retirement plan. Wally says he will live unhealthy and die in his cubicle, hopefully on a Monday.
Dilbert doesn't know when to high-five. Alice explains it's his lack of masculinity.
An easy way to double the perceived length of life is to attend meetings.
Einstein says time flows more slowly in meetings than in empty space. Because people are dense.
The Boss thinks Asok is a terrorist. Asok is tired of being accused of that.
Carol hears Asok is a terrorist sympathiser. Asok doesn't want to be radicalised.
Dick from the Internet accuses Asok of being a terrorist sympathiser. Asok denies it so hard, Dick doesn't believe him.
The Boss asks Asok if he threatened to kill Dick, because Dick accused Asok of being a terrorist.
Wally experiences the "Zeno's Paradox" phase of the project. Every step we take gets us halfway closer to completion.