The Boss says he couldn't open the document Wally sent him. Wally suggests erasing his hard disc and reinstalling the operating system.
Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.
The Boss asks Dilbert if he wants some constructive criticism. Dilbert says no, but would welcome some under informed opinions about things the Boss doesn't understand.
Bob the dinosaur says his flip phone does everything he wants. Alice asks why he is proud of that.
Bob the dinosaur is happy with his flip phone, his Windows XP and basic cable television.
Bob the dinosaur has a smart watch so is the coolest member of the household.
Dilbert doesn't let the CEO sit down at his meeting because the CEO's book says no more than eight people at a meeting.
Dilbert doesn't want to date a woman because she enjoys dancing.
Wally tells the Boss he needs to go to the cloud and fix a software issue. There is no cell coverage in the cloud so he can't be reached.
Carol says time with her family is like fighting porcupines in a salt mine.
Wally adds air bags to his underpants to avoid accidental assignments. The Boss approaches and they go off.
Wally doesn't want to help Alice, but Dilbert said everything Alice does is misguided.
Wally gives a coworker an analysis he did for her. She forgot to tell him she doesn't need it anymore.
The Boss interrupts his conversation with Dilbert to check a text message. He is more important and demonstrates his power.
Wally asks Alice what it's like to work hard. Wally thinks the reward for hard work is about the same as the reward for pretending to work.
Dilbert had to wait in the financial advisor's lobby for five minutes so he used that time to learn how to invest.
The Boss sees a financial planner whose ambition is to drain the Boss's account like a giant mosquito.
Wally wants to get into the strategic planning game. You hallucinate about the future then wait to see what really happens.
A marketing guy wonders why engineers get paid more than marketing professionals.
Carol tells the Boss Dilbert will be late for the meeting as he had a freak accident while vacuuming naked.
Tina heard Dilbert had a freak accident while vacuuming his house naked. Dilbert says it's just a rumour.
A co-worker tells Dilbert she is a perfectionist. He says thanks for the warning and asks if there are any other psychological problems.
The Boss wants Dilbert to show more leadership on his project. Dilbert says the team members may be bad followers.
Carol tries to show more passion for her job because Warren Buffet says her career will be better.
Tina approaches Alice and Dilbert on a break and says their conversation sounds interesting.
The Boss only has budget to hire an employee who is incompetent half the time. But he must use the budget, he will lose it next year.
Ted has been testing 3-D immersive goggles for two weeks. Dilbert asks him how it's going.
Dilbert says people like the immersive 3-D goggles so much they starve to death while using it.
The CEO wants to know why Dilbert didn't answer an email promptly even though it was sent at 1 A.M. Dilbert says people need sleep to be effective.
Dilbert invents tube-clothes, to eliminate clothing decisions like Mark Zuckerberg with his grey t-shirt.
Dilbert wears only tube-clothes as they reduce his number of daily decisions. Tina points out he also doesn't need to decide where to go on dates.
Dilbert, in his tube-clothes, starts a profile on a dating website and receives lots of responses for saying he is six feet tall, has hair and a job.