Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.

2014-01-01
Dogbert News Network says people continue to act like idiots. Things don't turn out well.

2014-01-02
Dilbert should format his presentation like a hero's journey, the Boss says. So Dilbert compares the Boss to a pointy-haired monster.

2014-01-03
The Boss criticises the behaviour, not the person. Carol sent an email that looks like it was written by a monkey on crack.

2014-01-04
Alice brings muffins so she won't need to watch her weight. She'll still look good even if she gains a few pounds.

2014-01-05
Asok's new philosophy is live for today. Wally says it's important to plan for tomorrow to avoid starving.

2014-01-06
Ted is moved to a new strategic engineering group. Ted believes it's because all the worst employees are being put into one group so the company can later eliminate that group.

2014-01-07
An iron sculpture fell on a security guard and the CEO made a bad joke.

2014-01-08
The Boss thinks caring for Wally's emotional well being to increase his engagement. So he gives Ratbert to Wally.

2014-01-09
Wally carries Ratbert on his shoulder to boost oxytocin levels without a relationship. Ratbert thought they were in love.

2014-01-10
Wally carries Ratbert on his shoulder to boost oxytocin levels without the need for human contact. Alice has had chipmunks living in her hair for a long time.

2014-01-11
The CEO practices self-deprecating jokes in front of Dilbert. He is glad Dilbert is around to do unimportant tasks.

2014-01-12
Dilbert convinces the Boss to fund an idea the Boss had for customer support software, even though it delays other projects.

2014-01-13
The Boss wants employees who are motivated by the company vision, not by money. Catbert says they are hard to find.

2014-01-14
Dilbert tests a new fuel source for the office robot. It's organic waste and is embarrassing to collect.

2014-01-15
The CEO wants to be more visionary than Elon Musk. He wants a spaceship full of robots to colonise other worlds.

2014-01-16
Alice can't do budget projections until the Boss tells her what his priorities for the coming year.

2014-01-17
The Boss asks Dilbert to get a product patch. Dilbert already has, and has applied it in production.

2014-01-18
Wally is mentally weak, has no ambition, but is the happiest person in the room.

2014-01-19
The company's product name is an insult in the Elbonian language, so the Boss hires an Elbonian to review some new choices.

2014-01-20
Asok greets the Boss joyfully and says his happiness is due to the Boss's motivations.

2014-01-21
The Boss tells Wally the key to career success is finding your special gift. Wally's gift is doing nothing but babbling jargon.

2014-01-22
A coworker didn't get Dilbert the data he requested because he didn't know how Dilbert wanted it formatted. But he didn't ask.

2014-01-23
The CEO tells the engineers to follow their instincts. So Alice slaps him silly.

2014-01-24
Alice slapped the CEO senseless after he said to follow her instincts. She was also being passionate, engaged and creative.

2014-01-25
The Boss adds Jeff to Alice's project team. She doesn't want him.

2014-01-26
The latest management fad is to engage employees and follow from the front. Catbert and the Boss don't understand what that means.

2014-01-27
Catbert says only top performers leave for higher pay. Since Dilbert is still here, he must be average at best.

2014-01-28
Dilbert's new project is a fleet of small drones for package delivery. The company calls their customers "infidels."

2014-01-29
Dilbert tells the CEO their customer for the fleet of drones is an international terrorist. The company will have to cancel the order and take a loss.

2014-01-30
Dilbert is being too negative, according to the Boss. Or maybe he's a good communicator surrounded by terrible ideas.

2014-01-31
A coworker can't tell if Wally is being passive-aggressive or incompetent. Wally wants to know which means less work for him.