Alice can't use her fist of death at work any more so she starts using her eye cannons.
Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.
Dilbert meets with a co-worker, who assumes everything he says will be bullying toward her.
Dilbert asks the Boss if he can order some hardware. The Boss gives an ambiguous response and then changes the subject.
The Boss interviews a candidate who announces he's bored and wants to leave.
Dilbert provides comments on the two alternatives, saying neither will work and option one is more expensive. The Boss ignores the comments.
Dilbert convinces a co-worker to do a task even though he doesn't want to do it.
Dilbert gets a lateral promotion where he now does two jobs for no increase in salary.
The Boss wants to grow the top line by 20% even though their products aren't competitive.
The Boss wants to know if Dilbert's projectionss are optimistic or realistic.
Dogbert provides training on going from being a useless employee to a toxic one.
Tina is offended when Dilbert said Ted is doing a great job. It implied she isn't important.
Wally tells the Boss he's fascinating and should continue doing more Twitter.
Carol suggests the Boss build his own helicopter and provides a website to order a kit.
Carol thinks the new dorkish engineer would get along great with Dilbert.
Dilbert does the sacred dance of the cubicle.
The marketing guy won't provide the customer survey data to Dilbert, so Dilbert doesn't know what customers want.
Dilbert talks to the Boss about his career path. The Boss lays out the truth and Dilbert doesn't like it.
Dilbert wants to attend a course to be more efficient. The Boss doesn't want that as Dilbert is billing by the hour to a government.
Dilbert doesn't have any followers on Twitter. A woman is not impressed.
Wally offers to balance traffic loads on the network. Asok pipes up to say the hardware vendor already did that.
Dilbert tries not to judge others by the quality of their technical questions. He doesn't think much of this question from a co-worker, though.
Dogbert does a survey to see which managers make dumb decisions. His interview with the Boss is short.
Dilbert is about to go to his skip-level meeting, where he meets with the Boss's boss. The Boss readies his retribution.
On a speakerphone, the engineers receive instructions the data centre is a lights out operation and employees are no longer allowed in there.
Asok rescues Wally from a work assignment by saying he's needed elsewhere urgently.
A co-worker interrupts Dilbert's presentation to complain that the numbers he received from Dilbert last week were wrong. But he didn't want to draw attention to himself.
The Boss introduces a lady to Carol but has trouble describing his professional relationship to Carol.
A co-worker asks why Wally hasn't finished the design yet. Wally says he only promised to start the design by now.
During an interview, the Boss asks about an applicant's DNA to find out whether he exercises much.
Ted can't get a raise because he's been using the company gym during work hours.
Dilbert is prepared for a financial meltdown: six months of food and water, batteries, flashlights and gold coins.