Alice asks Single-Task Bob for his revenue projections but he can't multitask and tells her about it.
Office Politics, revenue projection, single task, e-mail, song, multitask, binder, read, comprehend, Alice, Single-Task Bob
Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.
The Boss has a trap door installed in his office to work with his open door policy.
Management, trap door, open door policy, whiner, drop, rush hour traffic, splat, remember, Catbert, Boss
Dogbert wants to open a casino for people with bad luck.
Dogbert-Schemes, casino, gamble, bad luck, Dogbert, Dilbert
Dogbert presents his case for a casino to the gaming commission.
Dogbert-Schemes, casino, moron, gaming commission, dolt, take advantage, microphone, hearing, personal gain, Dogbert, gaming commissioner, Ratbert
Catbert tells Ted layoffs improve morale because it demonstrates management can make tough decisions.
Downsizing, personnel, morale, layoff, tough decision, optimistic, fired, turn around, Catbert, Ted
The Boss announces management wants to keep key employees around during hard times by giving retention bonuses.
Management, retain, key employees, hard times, retention bonuses, blackmail, Boss, Alice, Dilbert, Wally, Asok
The Boss says new product revenue will mean survival for the company.
Management, future of the company, revenue, product, slash, budget, research and development, future, doomed, Boss, Dilbert, Wally, Alice
A client for Dogbert's career counselling wants a job where he can talk and people must listen.
Dogbert-Schemes, career counselling, roll, eyes, phhht, babble, blame, punish, management, aptitude test, idea, mistake, client, Dogbert
The Boss brags to a customer their company has the highest profit margin in the entire industry.
Management, profit margin, high, whisper, Boss, customer, Alice
Alice describes her vision of a perfect husband -- one who cooks, cleans and raises the kids.
Start of saga: Alice considers a stay-at-home husband to support her career
Personal, husband, cook, clean, career, kids, turn on, yoo-hoo, lemon wedges, apron, live, Alice, Bobby, Carol
Alice talks to Bobby about him being her stay-at-home husband.
Personal, stay-at-home husband, career, chocolate, cold, hot, apron, Alice, Bobby
Alice talks to Bobby about him being a stay-at-home father.
Personal, stay-at-home father, marriage, children, lifestyle, servant, iron, restaurant, Alice, Bobby
Alice asks the Garbageman about a possible husband who would stay at home.
Personal, marriage, homemaking skills, present-value, cash-flow, comparison, trained monkeys, apron, cry, trashcan, trench coat, Alice, Garbageman, Bobby
The Boss says Dilbert's defects are described in chapter 23 of the book he is reading.
Performance Review, defect, chapter, book, photocopy, fix, information, Boss, Dilbert
The Boss discovers everything in his office feels clammy.
Personal, desk, chair, clammy, feel, telephone, mouse, hand, underpants, Boss, Dilbert, Wally
The Boss sends Dilbert on a sales call to the Vatican.
Start of saga: Dilbert goes on a sales call to the Vatican
Fashion, international sales call, dress, level, customer, cherub, lightning bolt, Vatican, beard, disguise, costume, Boss, Dilbert, Dogbert
Dilbert explains why he is dressed like a religious person to the woman beside him on a plane.
Fashion, plane, Vatican, sales call, dress, worry, giant hand, airplane, beard, disguise, costume, Dilbert, woman
The plane Dilbert has been travelling on has been grabbed by a giant hand.
Fashion, sales call, giant hand, grab, Vatican, television news, funny, airplane, beard, disguise, costume, pilot, Dilbert, news reader, Ratbert
The doctor recommends Carol switch to decaf coffee so she replaces all of the office coffee with decaf for her own convenience.
Health, coffee, decaf, replace, office, convenience, antidote, sleep, stethoscope, caffeine withdrawal, doctor, Carol, Wally, Boss, Alice, Dilbert
The Boss asks for suggestions on how to eliminate $200,000 of worthless fat. Everyone has a suggestion.
Budget, presentation, eliminate, worthless fat, hand, participation, Boss, Dilbert, Wally, Alice, Catbert
The Boss awards the employee of the year to... no one.
Presentation, employee of the year, luck, jealousy, trophy, podium, microphone, award ceremony, Boss, Dilbert, Wally, Alice, Asok
Alice experiences the seven stages of a performance review in quick succession.
Performance Review, seven stages, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance, trash-talking, lunch, falafel, objective, morale, budget, raise, Boss, Alice, Carol
The Boss announces the company will take a one-time charge to write down the value of their merger. It's a really big number.
Marketing, merger, one-time charge, write down, number, frooglepoopillion, goatee, Boss, marketing guy, Wally, Dilbert
The Boss and Dogbert figure out how to announce their record losses in a way their management looks good.
Management, record losses, announce, inebriated simian miscreants, graphics department, Boss, Dogbert, Ratbert
Dogbert helps the Boss smell like a good manager.
Dogbert-Schemes, good, smell, breath, fiery concoction, agree, Dogbert's Management Breath Enhancer, cigarettes, shovel, coffee, bullshit, Dogbert, Boss
The Boss asks Accounting what would happen if they wrote off some bone-headed mistakes. The troll's head explodes.
Accounting, what if, profit, bone-headed mistake, explode, worst case scenario, Boss, accounting troll
Dilbert reads the press release about the company's record loss. Their CEO steps down with a nice profit.
Accounting, press release, record loss, CEO, step down, tenure, shareholders, who's your daddy, Dilbert, Wally
Dilbert is embarrassed to tell people where he works because of the massive loss.
Accounting, frooglepoopillion, embarrass, afraid, truth, policy, pay attention, Dilbert, Dogbert
Alice is upset because she comes in four hours earlier than Wally.
Office Politics, late, early, coffee, bagel, lifetime, work, pay, die, smarter, curse, strategy, extra tasty, Alice, Wally
Ted calls a meeting to do a sanity check on his project. He complains flaming squirrels are eating his tongue.
Project, meeting, sanity check, flaming squirrel, eat, tongue, Ted, Boss, Alice