Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.

2003-01-01
Wally's family has been practising selective breeding to leave no biometric information behind.
Science, generation, male, selective breeding, offspring, biometric, pulse, fingerprint, DNA, why, lunch, Wally, Dilbert, Alice

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 66

2003-01-02
Dogbert's latest plan is to sell video phones to dimwitted identical twins.
Dogbert-Schemes, plan, low cost, video phone, identical twins, long distance, mirror, girlfriend, Dogbert, twin, Dilbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 67

2003-01-03
Carol tells the Boss a reporter wants to see him about dumping garbage in a park.
Science, reporter, garbage, park, possible, secret, spread, Carol, Boss

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 67

2003-01-04
A reporter accosts the Boss about dumping garbage in a park.
Science, garbage, dump, park, SUV, vehicle, scrape, tire, television camera, microphone, wasteful, steps, skull, investigative reporter, Boss

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 67

2003-01-05
The Boss introduces the new member of Dilbert's project team, Ron, aka Mo. Mo has his shirt on backward.
Management, member, project, team, shirt, backward, turn around, dimension, pay, grin, moron, Boss, Ron, Mo, Dilbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 68

2003-01-06
The Boss asks Wally to write a self-evaluation for an upcoming performance review.
Performance Review, self evaluation, rate, core value, honesty, integrity, claim, Boss, Wally

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 69

2003-01-07
The Boss says the paper shredding service is being centralised at corporate headquarters.
Office Services, shredder, centralise, corporate headquarters, eat, paper, take, Boss, Dilbert, Asok, Alice

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 69

2003-01-08
The Boss wants to schedule one person to do two tasks at the same time.
Management, software, schedule, task, patch, month, timeline, floopuary, Boss, Dilbert, Alice

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 69

2003-01-09
The engineers will try extreme programming, where two people work at one computer.
Programming, extreme programming, partner, system, computer, hate, software development, Boss, Wally, Dilbert, Alice, Asok

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 70

2003-01-10
Dilbert looks at a feature list from a co-worker and tells her he can't create all the features in the first version.
Programming, extreme programming, feature, version, user story, ruin life, software development, Dilbert, co-worker

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 70

2003-01-11
The Boss assigns Dilbert and Wally to work together on a code-writing team, extreme-programming style.
Programming, extreme programming, code-writing team, study, productive, whistle, nostril, harmonica, software development, Boss, Wally

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 70

2003-01-12
Asok presents an idea to the Boss: let project managers manage their own budgets.
Management, idea, project manager, budget, big picture, ignorant, self-manage, purr in your general direction, Monty Python, tiny fist, pummel, evil, Asok, Boss, Catbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 71

2003-01-13
A consultick describes his style to the Boss: burrow, suck and never leave.
Start of saga: The Consultick
Management, potential client, burrow, skin, suck cash, track record, failure, conflict of interest, red flag, consultant, hair, Consultick, Boss

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 72

2003-01-14
The Boss introduces the consultick to his department. The Boss thinks it's OK that the Consultick gives bad advice and is indispensable.
Management, advice, burrow, torso, implement, convince, Consultick, Boss

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 72

2003-01-15
Dogbert offers to remove the Consultick from the Boss's torso.
Dogbert-Schemes, Dogbert's Consultant Removal Service, burrow, torso, cash, wallet, operate, business card, Dogbert, Boss, Consultick

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 72

2003-01-16
Dogbert says he can save only one life when he separates the Boss and the Consultick.
Dogbert-Schemes, consultant, life, discuss, recommend, operation, knife, Dogbert, Boss, Consultick

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 73

2003-01-17
Dogbert tells the Boss the consultectomy operation was a success.
Dogbert-Schemes, consultectomy, operation, bed, cash, lost, wallet, transfusion, sedate, happy hour, genius, comb over, martini, unwilling donor, stethoscope, drunk, Dogbert, drunk man, Boss, Ratbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 73

2003-01-18
The Boss asks Wally to do something but changes his mind after seeing Wally's aura of extreme incompetence.
Management, request, assignment, aura, radiate, incompetence, cool down, lunch, Boss, Dilbert, Wally, Alice

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 73

2003-01-19
How to deal with new work requests when you are already overloaded at the departmental and professional level.
Management, request, scope, overload, flexible, client driven, responsibility, avoid, project, ignore, cheerful, accept, co-worker, Boss, Asok, Wally

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 74

2003-01-20
Dogbert on Dilbert working for an unethical company: Dilbert is loathsome and despicable.
Professional, ethics, bad person, loathsome, despicable, crud, shoe, rehearse, Dilbert, Dogbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 75

2003-01-21
The Boss asks Dilbert to build a new technology lab using the contractor with the lowest bid.
Start of saga: Lazy beaver wins bid to build technology lab
Contractor, build, technology lab, contractor, bid, problem, strategy, chance to gnaw on wood, foresee, Boss, Dilbert, beaver

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 75

2003-01-22
Dilbert asks the beaver, lowest bidder, to begin construction on the new technology lab.
Project, bid, award, construction, skill, craftsmen, book of excuses, telephone, Dilbert, beaver

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 75

2003-01-23
Dilbert explains to the Boss why the project is behind schedule: a lazy beaver.
Project, lazy beaver, behind schedule, contractor, excuse, return calls, plan, promise, future work, Dilbert, Boss

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 76

2003-01-24
Dilbert says their PC operating systems need upgrading, and likens it to a form of taxation by an evil shadow government.
Technology, upgrade, PC, operating system, stable environment, application, taxation, evil, shadow government, Microsoft, Dilbert, Boss, PC

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 76

2003-01-25
A vendor wants Dilbert to upgrade his software to the latest version. Only a million dollars.
Technology, upgrade, software, version, decompose, miasma, planned obsolescence, afford, goodbye, remote control, vendor, Dilbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 76

2003-01-26
Dilbert has to idle away the time when the Boss gets interrupted by the telephone.
Management, office, visit, telephone, interruption, wait, signal, mind-body connection, idle, fiddle, muscle, control, conscious, Boss, Dilbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 77

2003-01-27
Wally tells Dilbert he is leaving Dilbert's project for a more successful one.
Office Politics, bail, project, scent of failure, attach, survival, reject, loser pill, Wally, Dilbert, psychologist

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 78

2003-01-28
Instead of giving Dilbert more project funding, the Boss hires an expensive consultant to analyse the budget.
Consultant, fund, harp, response, analyse, budget, chaos, complexity simulations, money, Boss, consultant, Dilbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 78

2003-01-29
Dilbert invents the Visibuddy, a mindless replica to attend meetings and increase visibility.
Professional, invention, replica, meeting, visibility, hardly working, golf, toll, robot, android, Dilbert, Visibuddy, Boss

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 78

2003-01-30
The Boss congratulates Dilbert on his excellent visibility lately.
Professional, visibility, secret, replica, meeting, personality, neck bolt, robot, android, Boss, Dilbert, Visibuddy

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 79

2003-01-31
Ming asks Visibuddy, Dilbert's replica, for a date.
Dating, ask, replica, story, listen, clothing, describe, cat show, robot, android, fork, forehead, restaurant, wine, suicide, Ming, Visibuddy, Dilbert

Book: Words You Don't Want to Hear During Your Annual Performance Review, page: 79