Ted has resigned and the Boss asks Asok to find Ted's hidden files.
Management, resign, file, hide, clue, disgruntle, negatory, porcelain, Boss, Asok
Tip: You can download the DSI, which is the source for these strip descriptions. It's at the downloads page.
Asok finds Ted's files and a skeleton in the closet.
Office Politics, file, hide, skeleton, closet, babe, home wrecker, Asok, Wally
It's against company policy to date a skeleton, Catbert tells Asok.
Dating, policy, skeleton, closet, friend, swear, chip tooth, Catbert, Asok
The company can't meet demand for their product, so instead they hope to drive away customers.
Management, product, demand, arrogant, teach, bah, Boss, Dilbert, Dogbert
Dilbert will receive a new, company-approved, personality, Catbert says.
Personnel, personality, non-standard, approve, sycophant, glad hander, sadist, quantoid, prima donna, empty suit, whining misfit, spec sheet, Catbert, Dilbert, Wally
The Boss shows a new employee to his cubicle but with no network connection for six weeks.
Management, cubicle, network, connection, six weeks, status, update, IT department, checkup, Boss, new employee
Webmistress Ming says they don't pay enough to hire brilliant web people.
Management, pay, brilliant, web, webiot savant, stock options, reject, Ming
Wally says only ten percent of R and D projects succeed and others should be cancelled.
Management, research, development, project, succeed, fail, statistics, cancel, crazy idea, anger, lunch, Wally, Boss, Alice, Dilbert
The Boss asks Dilbert to change a one-page report into a two-page executive summary.
Management, report, executive summary, elastic band, underwear, idea, Boss, Dilbert
The Boss sends an e-mail describing the Employee Appreciation Luncheon -- potluck at his house.
Management, e-mail, employee appreciation luncheon, potluck, dish, groceries, Boss, Dilbert
Alice quantifies the benefits of the new knowledge management systems.
Presentation, quantify, knowledge management, benefit, intern, head, measure, drag coefficient, sandwich, fetch, Alice, Boss
The Boss asks Alice to not wear stirrup pants at the office.
Fashion, stirrup pants, patent, license fee, budget request, crisis, bad pants, Boss, Alice
Wally suggests changing the department name from Engineering to e-Engineering.
Meeting, staff meeting, department, name, e-engineering, marketing, idea, Wally, Boss, Dilbert
Dilbert's date is a basket case, and he tells her so.
Dating, swell, beach ball, IRS, jail, summary, basket case, hate, restaurant, wine, Dilbert's date, Dilbert, Dogbert
A new psychologist will help the engineers handle stress, the Boss says.
Health, stress, quack, pill, goatee, Boss, Alice, psychologist, Dilbert, Wally
The psychologist says stress is normal when a merger is pending.
Health, stress, merger, pending, normal, surprise, goatee, psychologist, Alice
Wally is uncertain which path to take: discover a shared vision or modify his conceptual map.
Management, shared vision, enrolment, compliance, conceptual map, organisational complexity, work, pay, Wally, Boss
Asok says he didn't accomplish much and maybe it would be better if he hadn't been born.
Management, meeting, task, accomplishment, born, slap, remind, Asok, Dilbert, Boss, Wally
Dilbert tells a sales rep about bugs in software, and the sales rep says it will cost to fix them.
Technology, software, bug, fix, defective, product, evil euphoria, fortune, single source, strategy, choice, raspberry, Dilbert, sales rep
Dilbert finds a unique way to accomplish more work with fewer people. The solution involves time travel.
Start of saga: Future Dilbert comes to the present.
Presentation, request, plan, more work, fewer people, future, time machine, unmotivated, projector, Dilbert, Boss
A Dilbert from the future comes back to meet Dilbert.
Family, ZZOOP, future, time machine, invention, weird, head, finger, hole, future Dilbert, Dilbert, Boss
Dilbert introduces his future self to the Boss.
Family, future, time machine, project, miserable, solid sewerage, assignment, Dilbert, future Dilbert
Alice meets the future Dilbert. The future Dilbert says Alice will be all over him at the next party.
Family, future, time machine, holiday party, drink, Dilbert, Alice, future Dilbert
The future Dilbert says he knows about all tragic events in Dilbert's life.
Family, future, time machine, tragedy, event, coffee, spill, crotch, ow, burn, scald, future Dilbert, Dilbert
The future Dilbert calls Dogbert "Your Majesty."
Family, future, time machine, majesty, retroactive, dance, future Dilbert, Dogbert
Tina reacts badly when the Boss touches her computer screen.
Management, computer, screen, finger oil, title, move, clean, hover, aura of infallibility, touch, Tina, Boss
Dilbert gives a CD-ROM business card including a list of his character flaws to a woman at a party.
Dating, CD-ROM, business card, film archive, character flaw, wine, Dilbert, woman
Dilbert saw his date's personal web page and she looked at his CD-ROM business card.
Dating, CD-ROM, business card, web page, conversation, restaurant, wine, Dilbert, Dilbert's date
Dilbert asks Anne L. Retentive to review a first draft.
Pun, review, first draft, world, fly apart, kill, comma, Dilbert, Anne L. Retentive, Wally
Dilbert uses bad assumptions and flawed logic to arrive at the Boss's predetermined answer.
Management, analysis, assumption, logic, flaw, predetermined answer, disillusion, pie chart, Dilbert, Boss
The Boss has cancelled dumpster service to save money.
Management, dumpster service, cancel, money, alternative, trash, garbage, pocket, Boss, Wally, Dilbert